Sacrifice is all about perspective...

It is not my intention to make a political statement with any of this - this is just where I am... today.

Air Force

Memorial,

Washington DC

On this Veteran's Day, I think about my spouse, who has spent most of his adult life as an officer in the US Air Force. He has been away many days from the comforts of home, has gone without enough sleep on innumerable nights, stood watch over airfields from pickup trucks in blustery North Dakota to the blistering heat of Oklahoma, and flown back and forth across the ocean countless times in support of military and humanitarian missions. Since completing OTS (Officer Training School), he has moved twelve times and had over 20 different job titles. He has missed birthdays, anniversaries, family and church events, and rarely worked normal business hours. And while I am his most trusted companion, for the last eight years we have traveled few places and slept few nights without his trusty work-issued Blackberry at his side.

On this Veteran's Day, I think of my dad, who graduated from high school in 1944 and entered the US Army with many of his closest friends. After a short time in basic training, he took a troop train to the West Coast, and got on a ship headed for the Philippines. He spent his last year of military service in Tokyo with General MacArthur's staff, and helped organize the return of troops and equipment back to the US at the end of the war. He thinks his crowning achievement was figuring out how to fly back the States himself so that he didn't have to get back on the blasted boat.

When he returned to North Carolina in 1947, he entered college, got his degree and teaching certificate, and spent a lifetime changing the world with his own special sense of honor and humor. We celebrated his 87th birthday yesterday, and he is happy to be alive, recently overcoming a bout with colon cancer. I've only heard him talk about his military service at length once, but I remember the details well because they explain so much about who he is and how he lives.

Tomb of the Unknown - Arlington National Cemetery

On the Veteran's Day, I think of my Uncle Johnny - my mom's younger brother, who entered the US Air Force as an enlisted Airman, graduated from college, and then re-entered as an officer. He lived in exciting places like Panama and Alaska. When he retired, he returned to Texas and spent the next twenty years taking care of his parents, inviting them into his home and bringing much joy to their lives. His service continues as a lay leader in his church and his Annual Conference and as a lay chaplain to people in need. He brings the same dedication to his work as a civilian as he did to his work as a member of the military. Today is his birthday, and he is a young 75 - still going strong.

This weekend we went out and ran errands, and when people saw my husband's ID card, they responded, "Thank you for your service," or "Thank you for your sacrifice to make our land free." It's a humbling experience, but I will be honest and say that the life we live doesn't really feel like sacrifice on most days.  It feels honorable and necessary and sometimes misunderstood, but I believe we have gotten more out of this life than we could ever have imagined, and that each of us has made a difference in some way wherever we have lived.

Yes, my life looks nothing like I imagined it would when I graduated from college or seminary... nothing like I expected when I got married and made our first PCS (Permanent Change of Station) as a family. I think of all the people I have met, the friends I have made, the places I have been, and the opportunities that have been laid before me, and I am in awe. I am so honored to be a military spouse. Honored to be a part of a special group of people, women and men, who are willing to wait while their military member does important work, at home and far away... people who give back to the community a measure of what they have received from those who came before us... people who are the family that we choose, in places far and wide.

Air Force Memorial, Washington DC

And while Veteran's Day celebrates the contributions made by all military members, here and abroad, who work for peace and accept the risks that go with that work, I also think today of those who have made a true sacrifice, the sacrifice of life and liberty. I think of military members who are separated from their families by oceans and time zones and experiences. I think of those who are lost as Prisoners of War and Missing in Action. I think of our three recently fallen Fairchild airmen, Tyler Voss, Victoria Pinckney, and Tre Mackey and their families, for whom this is more than a day of remembrance, a mere six month after their loved ones died in the line of duty. And I pray that one day we will truly live in a world where this is war no more.

Yesterday at church, we sang this wonderful hymn by Lloyd Stone, "This is My Song" ... you can see all of the lyrics here, but this verse by Georgia Harkness, a Methodist theologian and hymn writer, most caught my attention for this Veteran's Day celebration.  This is my vision of what makes the sacrifices, real or imagined, worth it all in the end.

May truth and freedom come to every nation;
May peace abound where strife has raged so long;
That each may seek to love and build together,
A world united, righting every wrong;
A world united in its love for freedom,
Proclaiming peace together in one song.

I saw and heard a lot of quotes today. These were some of my favorites.

"Courage is almost a contradiction in terms. It means a strong desire to live taking the form of readiness to die." -- G.K. Chesterton

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” -- John Fitzgerald Kennedy

“I believe it is the nature of people to be heroes, given the chance.” -- James A. Autry

Peace to all on the 2013 Veteran's Day. May it come true in our lifetimes.  Deb

Giving Our Undivided Attention

Today we celebrated PWOC Sunday at our base chapel.  The Protestant Women of the Chapel is the ministry by and for women at military chapels all over the world.  PWOC has four aims:

• to LEAD women to accept Christ as personal Savior and Lord;
• to TEACH women the history, beliefs, and programs of the church, all built on a solid foundation of worship and Bible study;
• to DEVELOP in women the skills of prayer, evangelism, stewardship, and social service, against a background of personal spiritual development;
• to INVOLVE women in the work of the Chapel, in keeping with their abilities and interests.

A special thanks to our wonderful chaplains who have invited me to preach and teach on more than one occasion. I am honored to be a part of a wonderful ministry team.

Giving Our Undivided Attention

It’s PWOC Sunday, a time to celebrate the work and ministry of women in our base family.  PWOC – Protestant Women of the Chapel… the name captures a lot, but is bigger than you might expect.  Our ranks include Protestants, Catholics and people who just love Jesus.  Some worship at the chapel regularly, but not all.  And with four wonderful, helpful, supportive chaplains as members of our ranks, we are not even all women.  But what we are is summed up in our mission statement: We are workers together for Christ.  So I thought today might be a good day to consider the story of Mary and Martha, for whom work was an issue.

[Read passage Luke 10: 38-42]

Hospitality was an important aspect of life people in biblical times.  Hospitality… welcome… meeting people’s needs… it’s against this backdrop that we examine the familiar story of Martha and Mary.  Like so many of the stories in the gospels, all we have are a few brief sentences.  Our imaginations have filled in the details not listed and shaped our interpretations of this story.

How do you see Martha – fussing over dinner, presiding over the kitchen, balancing the dozens of details that go into feeding a dining room full of guests?  I think her modern incarnation would come equipped with the efficient conveniences of an organized life, a smartphone or tablet at the ready with recipes, and information at hand to plan a perfect last-minute affair.  The Martha we think we know is a woman of action – there is no doubt about it!

And what about Mary – what does she look like?  Is she the dreamy, less practical sister, the one whose attention wanders from the task at hand to think of books, art, poetry, and music?  Or is she a young intellectual or perhaps a mystic?  There she sits, her eyes open wide, leaning forward to catch every word that Jesus has to share, her mind busily shaping questions as she listens eagerly, shutting out the world around.

It’s easy to imagine multiple dimensions to these sisters’ characters, but the truth is really only know what Jesus tells us… that they are simply two sisters, reacting in their own unique ways to the awe and wonder over this particular guest.

It’s clear that Martha and Mary have different expectations for Jesus’ visit.  Martha’s head is engaged with her responsibilities, while Mary is filled with Jesus’ presence.  The moment is one of conflict.  Martha has pictured this going a different way.  Her question to Jesus includes a request: "Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her to help me."

Many assume that Martha’s distraction centers on marshaling the resources for her household to provide hospitality for her guests.  But, in truth, she could have been preoccupied with any number of concerns.  Whatever they are, the important word used to describe Martha is “distracted.”  Her attention was focused on what she thought was important.  And when it didn’t all go the way she planned, she asked Jesus to do something about it.

In Eugene H. Peterson's The Message, Jesus replies in this way: "Martha, dear Martha, you're fussing far too much and getting yourself worked up over nothing. One thing only is essential, and Mary has chosen it—it's the main course, and won't be taken from her.”   In this brief conversation, I don’t think that Jesus is elevating one aspect of discipleship over another.  He is not discounting the need for outer preparations or exclusively commending the inward life.  Instead, he is asking for something more difficult… he is asking for a change in attitude in which he becomes the focus and foundation of everything we do.

My life is busy – how about yours?  Part of that is true because I want it to be that way.  I like being out and about, meeting with all kinds of people in all kinds of places.  I have also not perfected the use of one of the shortest words in the English language – NO, but that’s a sermon for another day.  But this story begs a bigger question:  where is our full attention?  Are we, like Martha, distracted by all of the activities that we have to do?  Or are we occasionally able to be Mary, totally focused on Jesus and who he has called us to be?

There is something in this story for all temperaments and tendencies. We could read it as a story that commends not allowing service to distract us from prayer and study. We could also, coming to Martha's defense, remember that we are not to use prayer and study as a free pass to avoid service.   In the end, we have to be able to put into practice all the lessons that Jesus taught.  Sometimes that will mean being alone with God.  Other times it will be about being in the world – loving people and being the hands and feet of Christ in the world.

Our undivided attention -- this is what Jesus asks of us in a world that holds more distractions than Martha could ever have imagined.  He is not telling us that work and family, and housekeeping, and management, and hospitality have no place. Instead, he urges us to choose Him first and let all of these other things take their place in line behind that choice.

Jesus asks us not to become so preoccupied with the details of life, even in our faith community, that we neglect the one in whom we have that faith.  His hope is that we will not become so concerned about hospitality when it is our turn to host coffee hour that we miss worship with the rest of those gathered.  We should not be so busy greeting old acquaintances that we do not see the guest in our midst.  And his desire is that we do not become so involved in managing our worldly affairs that we have no time for our eternal affairs – for prayer, study, reflection, and loving God in all we do.

If Martha, there in Bethany, could find herself distracted with Jesus actually under her roof where she could reach out and touch him, how much more vulnerable are we?  We have many tempting distractions at our disposal.  Consider our work responsibilities, leisure activities, relationships with family and friends, and volunteering in the community.  Then add to that the ability to be connected at any moment by phone, computer, text or television.    Preoccupied with all we have to do, we forget that church is not where we go – it’s who we are.

Here are the questions I hope you’ll consider this week.  What if we applied Mary’s kind of devotion to the way we live every day?  What if our everyday lives were the place where people encountered Jesus for the first time, and wanted to know him better, not because of a bible verse we gave them, but because of the way we live out those verses?  What if choosing the better part is not about what we do, but about the attitude with which we do everything?  What if our faith journeys were about the way we live, not just what we believe?

Will Willimon tells a story about a Duke sophomore who we’ll call John.  He was a Presbyterian who felt called to work in inner-city ministry after hearing Dr. Tony Campolo, a famous evangelical preacher, speak.  After a rigorous interview process, Mark was asked to join a summer mission team in Philadelphia, and later described his first day experience to Will.

In mid-June, John met about a hundred other youth in a Baptist church in Philadelphia.  They sang for about an hour before Dr. Campolo arrived, and when he did, the youth were all worked up and ready to go.  Dr. Campolo preached to them for about an hour, and people were shouting and clapping and standing in the pews.  Then Tony said, “OK gang, are you ready to go out and tell them about Jesus?”  “Yeah,” the kids replied, “let’s go.”

So he loaded them up on buses, singing and clapping.  But as they began to enter the poor neighborhoods of Philadelphia, the kids gradually stopped singing, and the bus John was on got very quiet.  Then they pulled up to one of the worst housing projects in the country.  Tony stood up, opened the door, and said, “OK gang, get out there and tell them about Jesus… I’ll pick you up at five.”

The young people made their way reluctantly off the bus.  And they stood in little groups and whispered as the bus made its way into the distance.  John walked down the sidewalk, faced a run-down tenement building, said a prayer under his breath and walked inside.  There was a terrible odor.  Windows were out.  There were no lights in the hall.  Babies were crying behind thin, scrawled walls.  He walked up one flight of stairs and knocked on the first door he saw.

“Who is it?” a voice called out.  The door cracked open, and he could see a woman holding a naked baby.  He told her he wanted to tell her about Jesus.  With that she slammed the door, cursing him all the way down the stairs and out into the street.

“What made me think I could do this,” he thought.  “What kind of Christian am I?”  He sat down on the curb and cried for a few minutes.  When he looked up, he noticed a store on the corner, and remembered the naked baby in the lady’s arms.  So he went in and bought a package of diapers and a pack of cigarettes, and went back and knocked on the lady’s door again.

“Who is it?” the same voice called again.  When she opened the door, Mark slid the diapers and cigarettes inside.  She looked at them and invited him in.  He put a diaper on the baby, his first, and smoked a cigarette, his first and last, and sat there listening to the lady and playing with the baby all afternoon.  About four o’clock, the woman looked at him and said, “Let me ask you something.  What’s a nice college boy like you doing in a place like this?”  So he told her all he knew about Jesus.  It took about five minutes.  And she replied, “Pray for me and my baby that we can make it out of this place alive.”  And he prayed.”

That evening, when they all got back on the bus, Tony asked, “Well, gang, did any of you get to tell them about Jesus?”  And Mark said, “I not only got to tell them about Jesus, I met Jesus.  I went out to save somebody, and ended up getting saved myself.  Today, I became a disciple.”

Choosing the better part can mean something different to each of us, but I’m betting that it will always be about making the transition from believer to disciple, and living with intention the life that God has given us.  Will we always be successful?  No, but doesn’t mean that we don’t keep giving it our best.  They don’t call it “practicing a life of faith” for nothing.  So as we go into the world, let us remember, we are all workers, together, for Christ.

Amen.

Thanks to Will Willimon and Alyce McKenzie for inspiring me to think of this scripture in a new way.

Vacation lessons...

We spent ten days traveling through Montana and the Canadian Rockies for our summer vacation. We had a great time together, saw some amazing things, and ate some wonderful food.  Here are a few of the lessons I learned along the way.  .

1. Planning is good, but be willing to change the plan if the occasion arises.  We are gatherers... I like knowing what opportunities are available, and once I have a good feel for what there is to do, I quit looking and make a plan. My spouse just keeps looking.  But eventually, we have to just go.  All in all, we did pretty well. We had some pretty fun things planned, and when necessary, we tweaked the plan to fill in the gaps to naturally occurred. Just in case you were wondering, yes to the Banff Gondola and Columbia Icefield Experience, yes to Johnston Canyon hike and Athabasca Falls, and you must at least do the short hike at Mount Edith Clavell in Jasper National Park.

2. Vacationing with your father-in-law can be fun.  Shawn's dad came to spend a few days with us at home before we left, but we were really excited that he could come with us on the trip.  He is such a good traveler, and offers another perspective on the things we see and do. I can honestly say the only thing we might have done differently is eat a few spicier meals and maybe some sushi. Otherwise, he helped make the trip even better than it would have been with just the two of us. Sometimes it's good to have a buffer or a person to be the tiebreaker when it was time to pick something to do or someplace to eat.

3. Making a vacation budget made it all a lot less stressful.  When we lived in Germany, we took lots of opportunities to travel.  It gave us a lot of practice in getting away and getting a lot done. As we did our research, we developed a reasonable expectation for what our hotel expenses would be, estimated our entrance fees for the things we wanted to do, and factored in food costs.  On this trip we kept our food costs down by eating hotel breakfasts when offered, taking a bag full of snacks with us, and making several trips to the grocery store along the way for water and picnic lunches.  Even with gas at over $5 per gallon, we were able to come in way under our budget.

4. Sometimes a cheap hotel is cheap for a reason.  No matter how many places you check, the "perfect" hotel may not be what you expect.  I booked all of our hotels online and eight of the nine nights were great - a couple close to perfect, in fact.  But there was one that wasn't exactly what we expected.  The good news is that we all decided to make the best of it... and be happy that it was the last night before going home.  I'm not going to "out" the hotel, but if you're planning to go to Radium Hot Springs in Canada, give me a call.

5.  Conversely, a storefront restaurant could give you the best meal of your trip.  Helena's Stube in Radium Hot Springs... authentic Austrian food and the best Wiener Schnitzel since we traveled to Germany last year.  So here's the tip: Ask a local for their recommendation... that usually sends you in the right direction.  (I should have taken a picture of my beautiful plate... trust me, it was absolutely delicious.)

We've been home for a little over a week and are fully immersed in our normal, everyday lives.  But the peace and joy lingers... and that's when you know it was all worth it.

Peace, Deb

PS - How was your vacation?

Reflections on the Rockies...

"Reading about nature is fine, but if a person walks in the woods and listens carefully, he can learn more than what is in books, for they speak with the voice of God." - George Washington Carver 

God is big... WAY bigger than I notice from day to day.

Lake Minnewanka, Banff National Park, Alberta ,Canada

Mt Edith Clavell and Angel Glacier, Jasper National Park, Alberta, Canada

Glacier National Park, MT

 Everywhere I looked, I felt small.  Not in a bad way, but in the "get over yourself" way.  Over the course of ten days, the things I considered to be problems seemed much smaller, and the joys that I sometimes overlook seemed much bigger.  In that time, we collectively took almost 1500 pictures and videos... two cameras and three cell phones trying to capture every amazing sight for posterity and to share.

Athabasca Glacier, Alberta, Canada

Of course, the big problem is that there is no way to capture the amazing things we saw on film.  No way to capture the smell of pines and leaves... no way to record the mist that surrounds you when you are able to get right next to a waterfall... no way to take the reactions of those who are seeing it all for the first time, or with new eyes, or in new ways.



Once again, I am confronted with the BIGNESS of God.  More than ever, I understand this world we have as a gift.  I see it's fragile nature.  Only 35 glaciers remain at Glacier National Park in Montana, and to really see those you must hike away from the road and the crowds. They predict that within 25 years there will no longer be any active glaciers there, and that the park will be a final testament to the power that glaciers had to move earth and shape the landscape in new and powerful ways.

If you see me and ask me about me about my trip, I will embarrass myself by whipping out my phone and showing you the pictures I took on it.  I want them to tell the story of our visit to one of the most peaceful and beautiful places I have ever been.  But on my phone, they are small, and even if I were to blow them up and plaster them all over my walls, they would only capture a part of what I would want you to know.

Our five senses and our brain are even more miraculous than we imagine. Believe me, the pictures only capture 20% of what lays before you when you are standing on that mountain or at that lake or walking down that path. If you are intrigued by what you have seen, then maybe this is your invitation to go on a journey of your own away from the expected and into places you have never been.

This trip has made a lasting impression on me.  It's easy to become blinded to the things that surround us. But in taking time to get away, I realized that I have to try harder to not take for granted how much better my senses make my life.

Just today we spent time in our tiny garden, tending to our tomatoes and peppers, our parsley and basil. We took care to water the parsley and peppers this morning, because we saw how droopy they were yesterday after the heat of the day. We marveled at the spiny fuzz that covers the tomatoes when they are very small, and how the flowers dip their little heads down if they have been fertilized and are making fruit, and how they shrivel and blow away if they are no longer needed.   We remembered the wonderful taste and feel of the meaty flesh of the one tomato that we have harvested, and look with great anticipation for the many that are to come. (I see tomato sauce in my future...)

This is a miraculous world we live in, my friends.  And I am more grateful than ever for the opportunity to explore it, one adventure at a time.

Peace, Deb

"The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God.  Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature.  I firmly believe that nature brings solace in all troubles." - Anne Frank 

Erroneous Assumptions

image credit www.brianporolli.com 

“It is tempting, if the only tool you have is a hammer, to treat everything as if it were a nail.”  -- Abraham Harold Maslow

"We simply assume that the way we see things is the way they really are or the way they should be. And our attitudes and behaviors grow out of these assumptions." -- Stephen R Covey

The summer between my first and second years of seminary, I served as a pastoral intern at a church in North Carolina.  This helped me to put into practice some of the things that I learned at school, determine that parish ministry was still my planned professional goal, and earned me a hefty scholarship to pay for my second year of school.  At our monthly intern meetings, we would share things that we were experiencing in our churches, and I was struck at a major difference between the experiences of the men and the women interns in our midst.

The first month, the single men told stories about all the different people in their congregations who had invited them for meals.  The second month, most of them wanted advice on how to get their congregants to stop arranging dates for them with their daughters, nieces, granddaughters and neighbors.  I looked around and noticed that none of the single women interns were having that problem.  In fact, it turned out that we were spending a lot of evenings alone.  I remember that while people were very kind (for the most part), most of them didn't really know what to do with me. It was as if they were asking themselves these questions: Do we have anything in common? Is it a problem that she is still single at almost 30?  Are women supposed to be ministers?

Looking back almost 25 years, I never knew how formative that was for me.  I see how people made erroneous assumptions about me and my ministry.  Some assumed that I was trading in a personal life for a professional one.  Others thought I didn't want to marry and have a family.  Somewhere deep inside, I felt like they couldn't see me as a whole person, and in my attempt to raise my professional profile, I tried to be super-efficient in the way I did ministry.  Instead of challenging the way they thought about me (and women clergy in general), I bought into their erroneous assumption and worked my fingers to the bone. I got a great evaluation that summer, but I'm not sure that I did much to change the way they thought about women and ministry, as a whole.  And because I didn't make any close personal relationships with anyone, I have never been in touch with any of them again.

A few years later, I again bought into an erroneous assumption - the ones that says that women ministers were not supposed to look like, well, women.  One winter night, I wore dress slacks to a mid-week service at the church where I served.  The next day, 25 people called the church office to complain.  It took almost 20 years for me to wear pants again while leading worship.  At every church since, even as a volunteer, I made sure that I looked totally professional, but not too feminine.  In my need to fulfill an erroneous expectation, I'm not sure I did me or the women who followed me a good service.

Last month, I watched the coverage of the Trayvon Martin trial and its aftermath.  And I've been thinking about the assumptions we make about others based on what they look like, what they do, and who we expect them to be.  Race, age, weight, unusual looks or hobbies - these are just a few of the things that can have the effect of separating us from others rather than drawing us together, in spite of the other things we may have in common.

On July 19th, President Obama surprised the White House briefing room by making a very personal statement about the trial and the conversations swirling around the country.  (If you didn't see it, click here.) He proclaimed his confidence in the way that the Zimmerman trial was conducted.  He gave us an insight into his experience as a black man, where the assumption is that he will do something wrong if given the chance. And he asked that we as a society not dismiss the African American experience just because it may not be our own.

We often make erroneous assumptions about others out of fear.  But Jesus calls us to live in love and to look at people in the way we would want to be looked at by them.  He calls us to redefine what it means to be in relationship with one another, and to look for new ways to see each other, all through the lens of love.

This is exactly what Jesus' ministry was all about.  He challenged the assumptions of the world around him and called people to a new way of living.  He hung out with people the world considered outcasts and he challenged the powers of the world to examine their behaviours and intentions.  And ultimately, they killed him for it.  But God did not let it all end there.  The resurrection is all the evidence we need to know that our assumptions about the way the world is supposed to work may not be true.  The Church should be the place where we can support one another in seeing life through new eyes and witnessing to the world a new way of living.

Last night I was thinking about the idea of "neighborhood watch."  In the dictionary, it's defined as a group of people who are devoted to crime and vandalism prevention.  But what if we took "neighborhood watch" to a whole new level?  What if is became the way that we looked out for one another, taking the opportunity to recognize the people who live around us, and make our neighborhoods a more inviting place to live?

I know, it will take a lot of work... a lot of risk... a lot of trust.  But I will be worth it all.  We have so much to learn.

Peace, Deb

[Jesus said,] "I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another.  By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 13:3 NRSV

The Pinterest Generation

Have you pinned lately?  Don't know what I'm talking about?  Have you seen that cute little curly "P" on a website or at the bottom of an email?  In case you've been missing out, Pinterest is the new rage among the social media jet set and military spouses all over the world.

How does it work, you ask?  Well, it's way too simple... and addictive... and many, many hours have been lost in the midst of boards and pin and comments and likes.

Just a little primer:  Sign up for a Pinterest account.  Then, when you see a recipe, a wall decoration, a dress or a pair of shoes, a saying or a place that you'd like to remember and be able to access quickly in the future, just "pin it" and it will be there to find with you're ready to bake or cook or shop or be creative.  I must admit that I am a fan.  I've been pinning my way through the internet for about a year.  I started with one board dedicated to food... soon I split that board into six boards... sweets and savory... party foods and soups... breads and, just for kicks, a board dedicated to healthier food options than all of the other boards espoused. There are also boards for cool sayings, clothes and shoes (with just a total of 8 pins - just not my thing), beautiful places and spaces, books worth reading, and a board called "Who Knew?" for quirky things I might want to look for one day.

Now here's where it gets "social."  Once you start your boards, you invite people to "follow" you.  That way, they can see what you are interested in, what you're pinning and what you're saying about the things you like. And then you follow them back.  And soon there are all of these concentric circles, like ripples in a pond. Through this medium, ideas are shared and dreams are dreamed.  And it's a really pretty storage medium, which I like a lot.  No paper, no muss, no fuss.

I do have to admit, that while I have pinned almost 500 recipes, most of them have gone untested.  And some, which looked interesting in concept just didn't work out in practice, or they got jettisoned for something more desirable along the way.  I do try to make a habit of going through my boards every month or so and discarding pins that no longer interest me, or comment on ones that were especially good or a mediocre mess.  Do my Pinterest boards reflect the person that I am today?  I'm no so sure, but if so, I must be a big ole' chocolate bar, because over 60% of my food boards involve the melty, dark stuff.

I wonder if there is a spiritual equivalent to the Pinterest board... the place where theological principles and religious writers go to be quoted, but almost never lived out.  Am I espousing beautiful quotes about life and faith and God, but not reflecting them in my life everyday?  If you look at the quotes about life and faith I have posted, would you recognize them in the way I live?  Or are they wishful thinking on my part, and a picture of the world the way I want it to be?  Or worse yet, is pinning a theological position as far as I'm willing to go?

I don't know the answer to those questions... I don't even really know if they are legitimate questions at all. But I do know that I want what I profess to be reflected in the way I speak, live and post.  I hope that we're not just collecting snapshots of life without really living it. I hope even when we're trying to be healthier and more joyful in our living, that we can enjoy the journey and bring that same joy to those around us.

I thought to end I'd share some of my favorite sayings as posted on my Pinterest boards.  Tell me what you think.

And here's one of my favorite recipes, just for kicks... this one I have tried and LOVE, LOVE, LOVE... it's worth every minute of the time it takes to prepare.

Raspberry Swirl Sweet Rolls from Sally's Baking Addiction can be found here..... 

They really are totally amazing... I promise.

Peace, Deb

Life is not like a DVR...

In 2001, the UPS m an delivered a box to our house.  The label on the outside said, "REPLAY TV."  When my husband got home, he rubbed his hands together with the excitement that many a techno-geek has experienced.  When I asked, "What is it?" he responded, "You're going to love it, I promise."  And he was right.  For what we had was  DVR - a digital video recorder.  No more VHS tapes... instead we would use a program guide to schedule recordings, and as an extra bonus, would be able to froward through commercials with the mere press of a button.  I think that we could record an amazing 30 hours of programming at that time, quite an amazing feat... and we could look at the recorded programming guide and just pick what we wanted to watch - no fast forwarding or rewinding.  We could even record one channel and watch something different, or watch a show from the beginning, even if it hadn't finished recording. As far as TV watching was concerned, it was pretty spectacular.

Over the years, we have replaced and even added to our REPLAY TV collection.  After replacing worn out hard drives and upgrading them to something faster and bigger, we can record up to 240 hours.  I have held on to programs that I haven't wanted to get rid of quite yet (I still have the whole season from BONES last year - yes, it was that good - and both seasons of SMASH).  Sometimes when there's not anything good to watch, I'll head into the other room and watch something I know that enjoyed before.  And even better, (especially during election season) I have skipped over more commercials than I care to imagine.  Wouldn't we like the chance to fast forward though difficult times in our lives?  Yeah, it doesn't work that way.

Life is not like a DVR - sometimes you have to just be apart of what's happening, even if it's not your choice. You can't change the channel.  You can't skip over the parts you don't like.  You learn things you'd wish you didn't know.  You are changed.

I am often reminded that it's the hard parts of life that end up making the most changes in me.  I grow through the challenges that I face, not through the easy parts. I learn from the questions I get wrong on the test, not from the ones I get right.  I become a better friend when I reach out beyond my comfort zone, taking the hand reaching out to me.  And all of the experiences of my life make me the one God has called me to be, rather than the person I imagined I would be.

One of the most interesting things about being a part of the Facebook community and authoring my blogs in the last several years is that I feel like I am known.  Through these communities, I can share my joys and challenges.  I can be kidded, encouraged, and sometimes called on the carpet. (My friend Shannon in Atlanta recently reminded me that Auntie Anne and her pretzels are not my friends... I have since extended that friendship ban to her cousin, Krispy Kreme.)  At SC Conference last month, many shared how they have been prayer for our community in the midst of a tragic loss.  My life is no longer an unknown to people I have loved over the years.  And theirs are not unknown to me.

We are connected to each other through our joys and our concerns.  We celebrate, we cry, we question, we grieve, we laugh, we love... and through it all, we live.  No rewinding, no fast-forwarding, just living life one day at a time.

It's all a gift.  Thanks be to God.

Peace, Deb

"A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing."  George Bernard Shaw

"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."  Erma Bombeck 

Are You My Neighbor? (Sermon 7/14/13)

Luke 10:25-37                                         Fairchild AFB Chapel                                             July 14, 2013

Are you my neighbor? A Story of Radical Obedience

I checked my sermon bucket, the place where all sermons, good, bad and indifferent, go to reside after they are preached.  I was really surprised to find that in 22 years of ministry, I have never preached on the parable of the Good Samaritan.  What an amazing opportunity to teach on one of the most well-known and beloved of Jesus’ parables.  And what an unbelievable burden, since we think we know what this parable is all about.  Jesus’ stories often send us in a different direction than we originally intended to go.  And that, my friends, is a very scary proposition.  So let us begin.

In his book, Crazy Love, Francis Chan begins with this quote from 17^th century French priest Francois Fenelon, “To just read the Bible, attend church, and avoid “big” sins – is this passionate, wholehearted love for God?”  And yet that’s the way many of us live.  But what would it be like if we really got to know God in all of his infinitely amazing ways?   What if we took Jesus seriously and committed to loving others wholeheartedly?  What if the Bible and its story weaving through time became our story?  What would life look like then? 

Today we encounter Jesus in conversation with a member of the following crowd.  Now there were two kinds of people who showed up whenever Jesus was around… those who were desperately in need of what he had to share, and those who wanted to trip him up.  The desperate ones were usually not members of polite society.  They were poor, lame, or diseased.  They were shunned, shamed and forgotten.  They were the woman who touched Jesus’ garment for healing, lepers who had spent much of their lives in solitude, people with shady backgrounds or occupations – In short, the outcasts of the world.

The ones who wanted to trip him up were the people who saw Jesus as a threat.  The one we encounter today is introduced as a scribe – one who as a traveling judge dispensed legal advice on complicated matters of Torah and Talmud – the law and it’s interpretations through hundreds of years.  This scribe must have found Jesus’ teaching quite threatening.  We hear him ask Jesus a simple, complicated question.  This testing by the scribe is actually a way of challenging Jesus’ honor, even more than his knowledge of the Law.  The man’s question about how to inherit eternal life is not about personal salvation.  It is much bigger than that.  His question is really about “Who is in?” and “Who is out?” 

And to this expert in the law, Jesus replies – love God with everything you have – heart, soul, strength & mind – and your neighbor as yourself.  This statement implies that no part of us or our lives is to be withheld from God.  There is no compartmentalizing in God’s world… no such thing as a personal or professional… no sense that faith is only lived on Sunday.  Indeed, when one loves God fully, life is lived out in service to others as a natural extension of that love… we can do nothing else.  The scribe, a lawyer, is indeed well read.  But Jesus’ answer shows us that knowing about God or the law is not enough.  Real love of God is found in living the commandments in everything we do.  Real love of God is about being “all in.”

The scribe’s follow-up question, “Who is my neighbor?” is meant to push Jesus out on a limb, exposing him to the judgment of the religious elite.  But Jesus does not back down.  He answers the question by telling the story we all know so well, but as with many of Jesus’ stories, it has a twist the crowd is not expecting.  Our story’s twist:  the hero of the story is by all accounts the enemy.  Samaritans were other, outsiders, unclean and unacceptable.  But by making this man the one who lived within  the commandments of God, Jesus smashes through all the conventional excuses for separation.  Race, religion & region (or nationality) – they count for nothing with Jesus. This Samaritan risks everything by showing compassion for a stranger.  And as this preconceived idea about Samaritans is shattered, all other stereotypes assumed by the crowd are in essence invalidated.

Even more remarkable, the Samaritan provided rescue and recovery for the man, expecting nothing in return.  His actions are a gift.  Jesus is teaching us that neighbors are not bound by social boundaries or class divisions.  Neither is mercy the product of a calculating heart, nor eternal life the reward for a life well lived.  Being a neighbor does not earn us a place in heaven.  Being a neighbor is what we do in response to the gift of eternal life that is already ours through Jesus Christ.  Eternal life is the promise.  Loving God and neighbor is the “thank you” note we write with our lives every day.

Now with parables, it’s natural to see ourselves in the characters, and this one is no different.  Upon first reading, I want desperately to see myself in the role of the Samaritan – a helper and friend to those in need.  But as I study it more and more, I see in myself much more of the other players in the story.  You know, the Priest and the Levite had excellent justifications for not stopping to help... to touch a dead body would make them unable to perform their appointed duties.  That happens to me, too.  I see myself often too busy to stop and help, even when I see a need that I can meet with little delay in my schedule.  Or maybe I'm afraid of what others will think of me if they see me relating to someone outside my tiny, comfortable world.  I can even see myself as the beaten up man, at times alone and battered by life, wondering if anyone really cares about my pain, my loneliness, my isolation.  

We can easily be lured into thinking of Jesus as a kindly Savior, one whose friendship assures us of a place in heaven.  We are comfortable with the idea of someone who saves us from our sins… and ourselves.  But it’s always a surprise that Jesus rarely talked about that kind of stuff. 

More and more, I realize that Jesus didn't come to make sure that things stayed the way they had always been.  No, whether we like it or not, Jesus came to change the world - to upset the apple cart, to challenge the status quo.  Prevailing religious wisdom said that following the letter of the law would save the world – some of us even live that way today.  Instead, Jesus asked the people (and us) to follow two commandments:  First, to love God with everything we have.  And then, as a natural outpouring of that relationship, to love our neighbors as much as we love ourselves.  In a nutshell, the 613 laws from the Torah and thousands of interpretations all boil down to one simple command – just LOVE.

And yet, in its simplicity, LOVE the most difficult challenge of all.  Why is that?  Because it often contradicts everything that the world says is important.  In his first letter to the church at Corinth, Paul writes to a congregation struggling with what it means to live outside the world’s expectations.  “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God…  Where is the wise person? Where is the teacher of the law? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world?... For the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength.” (I Corinthians 1:18, 20, 25)

If nothing else, we live in a world that considers itself wise.  The trouble is that everyone’s understanding of wisdom is different.  I used to watch the news regularly, but somehow news coverage has devolved into commentary, people from all sides telling me how to think and live, and calling me stupid and worse if I disagree with them.  It’s no surprise that The New York Times has eliminated the comment sections on many of its news stories and editorials because people are so vile in their responses to what is written, with ugliness and condemnation equally shared from all sides of every issue. 

As I think about this parable and its challenge for my life, I realize that I have got to quit picking sides.  Republican/ Democrat – liberal/conservation – black/white/Hispanic – American/Foreigner – old/young – Christian/Muslim/Jewish/or No religious faith at all – Jesus tells us that all of these and all the others we can think of are false dichotomies.  The only question Jesus wants answered is “are you a neighbor to someone who needs you or are you not?” Or to put it another way: “Do you live out mercy?  Do you live in love?”

If I’m honest with myself, I realize that I have such a long way to go.  It’s too easy to get comfortable… to be lured into a routine which makes “busywork” demands of my time and my energy… too easy to be blinded to the needs around me… or to make assumptions about others… too easy to assume that those who don’t agree with me are my enemies… or expect someone else to take care of those needs that I’m just not that interested in meeting… too easy to worry about what others will think about me when I stand up for those who are deemed “other” and “outside” by the rest of society… It’s often too easy to just not care.

Zig Zigler wrote, “You have never really lived until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.” As soon as I saw this quote, I thought of this parable. And this week, I remembered my own Samaritan story.  A few years ago, Shawn and I left our dream assignment in Germany for ultra-sunny Altus, OK.  As usual, we checked out the local Methodist church and settled into a hot and windy life. 

A few weeks later, I was chatting with one of the ministers and said what I always say, “Let me know if I can do anything to help out with your ministry here.”  The associate minister and the office manager shared a look, and one of them said, “Well, there is this member who could use a little TLC.  She’s in the middle of treatment for a workman’s comp accident and has to travel to OKC once a month for appointments and procedures.  Her car isn’t reliable enough to make the trip, and it’s probably good for her not to drive in the city anyway.”  It sounded like a simple matter… take someone to a doctor’s appointment two hours away and maybe grab a bite of lunch and squeeze in a stop by TJ Maxx while we were gone.

The day before our first trip, I checked in with the office to get the address and to call J, who wouldn’t pick up the phone for a number she didn’t recognize.  I called from the church, and after I talked to her, I thought for a minute and then asked the staff a question I hadn’t thought of before.  “Is there anything else about her I should know?”  “Did we mention that she’s a former crack addict and spent two years in jail for check fraud?”  Long pause…… “Uh, no, I think I might have remembered that.”  “You’ll be fine.  She’s a good conversationalist,” (which is the equivalent of asking about someone’s looks and hearing, “She has a great personality.”)

For the next year I took J back and forth between Altus and OKC.  We talked about the oddest things.  I found out about her son, an AF NCO, her abusive ex-husband, and her favorite TV shows, “Prison Break” and “Dog, the Bounty Hunter” – ironic choices, for sure.  I saw the world from a whole new perspective, learned about how food stamps work, and how a person can live on $400 a month, including feeding two rescued Rottweilers.  Sometimes we talked about theology, but not very often.  J’s needs were simple.  She just wanted to get through her surgeries and hopefully receive enough disability benefits to not have to go back to work. 

There were days when I asked myself, “What were you thinking when you volunteered for this?”  Often, helping out was inconvenient and downright messy, like when I cleaned up throw up from the front seat floor mat after she had some out-patient surgery.  But at the end of each journey, I knew that I had made a difference.  J believed that someone cared, even though she didn't often say the words, “Thank you.”   

Eventually, my time with J came to an end.  Her longtime drug use had caused some dementia, and she finally went to live in a long-term care facility near her son and his family.  She was only 51 years old.  J wasn’t someone I would have chosen to be my friend, but in the end, she was my neighbor.  And because of her, I think differently about poverty and addictions and know something more about the lengths some people will go just to survive. 

We have a long way to go, my friends, if we are going to claim to be true neighbors to those around us.  Radical obedience to God’s commandment of love is a lifetime’s work.  It’s hard.  It’s scary.  It’s uncomfortable.  And in this story we are told that it’s what’s required to be true neighbors and deeply devoted disciples of Jesus Christ.  Maybe I have this sermon title all wrong.  Instead of the one I came up with in the beginning of the week, “Are you my neighbor?”  a new one may be more on point… “What kind of neighbor am I?”

The prophet Micah summed up a life dedicated to God in this way: “He has told you, O mortal, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8)

May it be so with us!  Journey on, my friends, journey on.

Amen and Amen.

Almighty and merciful God, you have planted in us the seed of your word.  Help us by your Holy Spirit to receive it with joy and live according to it, so that we may grow in faith, hope, and love.  Lead us to reflect this love to our neighbors by helping them in all their needs.  We ask this through your Son, Jesus Christ our Lord, who taught us to prayer together saying, Our Father, which art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.  Thy kingdom come.  Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.  Give us this day our daily bread.  And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.  And lead us not into temptation. But deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory, forever and ever.  Amen.

Peace, Deb

Never underestimate the power of prayer

SC Annual Conference closed on Wednesday with a worship service to set appointments.  In the "old days" the bishop read out where each minister in the Conference would be appointed.  Sometimes this reading was the first indication pastorss had that they would be moving and where they would be going.  Ministers changing churches would then go home, pack up their houses and their families, say goodbye to their churches, and be in the new place within two weeks.  My mom grew up as a preacher's kid in Louisiana.  She said this practice kept ministers from leaving Conference early.  Her dad would call before he started home to let my grandmother know whether she had to start packing or not.  High anxiety, to be sure.

Nowadays, the list is finalized before conference and handed out in printed form.  Only a few changes are recorded at the session as we all read along.  As each district has its appointments set, clergy and lay members from each stand and prayers of blessing are raised.  It's not a time of high anxiety for most, but for some a time of change is about to occur, and those prayers are especially appreciated.

But it was not that time of prayer that I remember most about last Wednesday.  Instead, it was a prayer offered during our time of business and voting.  Each Annual Conference presents on the first day a budget to be approved and resolutions to be voted on before the Conference closes.  These activities can also be a source of high anxiety, especially in these times of financial uncertainty and political division.

I thought that this year's Conference was especially congenial.  Every session ended on time or early, and there were no moments of high drama or uncertainty, at least not from my perspective.  But on Wednesday morning, the possibility existed that our good fortune would run out. Resolutions about education, health care, and gun control had the potential to derail our course.  People were passionate about their positions, and debate became heated.  As we prepared to cast a written ballot for one of the votes, the Bishop asked everyone to be still, sit in a seat, and to be in an attitude of prayer.  And he prepared us to pray, reminding us that no matter which way the voting went, the outcome would not be about winning or losing, but about loving and supporting even those who had different perspectives that ours.  So when the results were announced, there would be no clapping or celebrating from one side or the other.  We would just go on and be about the business we were called to do as the people called United Methodist in South Carolina.

I felt the attitude of the body change in that moment.  The Bishop's prayer was a centering moment.  He was loving, kind, and firm in his leadership.  In the end, we made a choice, went on to the next item, and ended the business session, once again on time and ready to move ahead.

It was a holy moment, a prayer in the midst of the business of the Conference, and it reminded me that no moment in time, no issue or position, no gathering of Christian people, where an earnest, compassionate prayer is prayed in vain.  In spite of the other great experiences of the week (renewed friendships, inspired preaching and missional service), this is the moment that made the biggest impression on me.  And in a decade when we United Methodists have not always been kind to one another, it gave me great hope.

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law." Galatians 5:22-23

Peace, Deb

It's like a college reunion, only lots better...

Methodists are "meeting" people.  Early in our history, we had class meetings as a way to model discipleship.  People met, read scripture, shared their joys and concerns, and their struggles and successes in living for Jesus Christ.  In America, the people called Methodists gathered once a year for camp meeting, revivals often lasting for a week, where people lived and ate, studied and worshiped, together.  Some camp meetings still occur on a regular basis, and if you ever get invited to attend, you should go - it's an amazing experience of how God works through the lives of regular people who appreciate their historical roots.  A Methodist's first response to a problem might be to form a committee and have a meeting... we're working on this, but sometimes old habits are hard to break.

And every year, each geographical area comes together for Annual Conference, where we worship and study together, and do the business of the church.  Sometimes this all goes very well.  Other times there are bumps in the road.  So far this year, it has all gone VERY smoothly.  We have gotten out on time or early from every worship and business session, and we're getting along amazingly well.  Social resolutions and budget approval are saved for tomorrow - we're hopeful it can all continue to be so amicable that we don't get mired down in the midst of what has been a delightful experience so far. 

We have a new bishop, Jonathon Holston, who is awesome in every way I can see.  He is gentle, but firm in his leadership.  And when he's preaching, if he steps out from behind the pulpit, watch out. You will not be able to resist answering back when he calls out.  He has inspired us to new dreams and plans, and given us permission to think outside the box.

There have also been some great quotes from reports and sermons.  Some are real head-nodders.  Others I'll be thinking about for quite some time.

Bishop Holston:

• We are called to make disciples, not members.
• May the business of the church never become so important that it overlooks the beauty of the church.
• 3 best sounds in church: Unfolding of extra chairs; Babies crying; and Sound of checks being ripped out of checkbooks.
• Mark Twain said the scriptures he had the most trouble with are not the ones he didn't understand, but the ones he did and didn't like.
• Do not pray for lighter burdens but for stronger backs.
• 90% of "I can't" is really "I don't wasn't to."
• How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator?  First, you have to open the door and take the elephant out.
• There comes a time when you're in the "way down yonder" with nobody else... Walking through the valley of the shadow... Take up you're cross, because with it, you will never be separated from the love of God in Christ Jesus.  Knowing all of this, are you up for the challenge for being God's people?

Others:

• While we think of all the things going against us in ministry, we must be reminded that we all have these three gifts for ministry: 1) Place in time, 2) Point on the map, 3) Good news of Jesus Christ. With them we can do anything. -  Susan Leonard Ray
• When asked why he made a change in funding motion today instead of waiting until the budget discussion tomorrow, Rev John Culp responded, "Because God told me, 'Don't wait.  Make it today.'"

Conference Highlights:

• Reconnecting with clergy and laity who saw gifts for ministry in me before I saw them in myself.
• Sharing memories with members of my first church, including three of former youth who are now in full-time ministry in our Conference.
• Having a realization that even though I have spent many years outside of the bounds of my conference, I am still one of them.
• Today (Tuesday 6/11), 287,000 meals were packaged and over $135,000 was raised to meet the hunger needs of people in Haiti and South Carolina.  Click here to learn more about this amazing project to relieve hunger worldwide. 7000 pounds of food were also donated for the local food bank.  (I spent the afternoon shaking rice out of my shoes.  The whole experience was very fun.)

Often Methodists think of Annual Conference as something they have to do, as in "required."  Our hope is that Annual Conference could be come something we have to do, as in "helping us understand who we are."  

May we all have the opportunity to refocus on what's important and what gives our lives real meaning.

Peace, Deb

Travel musings

I got up at O-dark thirty this morning for the day long trip back to South Carolina to visit my family and

attend Methodist Annual Conference for the first time in three years. I do have a good excuse for being absent these last few years... It's the first time since 2009 that I haven't had packers preparing us for a journey to a new part of life. And since we'll move again next year, I knew I had to make the trip while I could.

I also am excited to see my parents for the first time since my dad completed his chemo in March. He's doing well and I can't wait to explore the garden they have been working on all spring.

Since I've had a lot of time to think, maybe you know the answers to some of these questions.

• What are the rules regarding the sharing of airplane armrests?
• Why don't more airports carry Perrier?
• Why do airports advertise free Wifi, except they want you to pay $4.95 to access anything more than the airport's website?
• "Cheese Nips has real cheese. Original CHEEZ-IT doesn't." But I like CHEEZ-ITs better... I wonder why?
• I get flying in yoga pants and flip flops, but what's the deal with jean miniskirts and 6 inch platform heels?
• How airport laps will I have to do to work off the Auntie Anne's pretzel I had with (not for) lunch?
• Where else but Nashville do you get live music at the airport food court?

Other observations:

• I never want to read a real book more than when I see them displayed at an airport bookstore.
• I love airports that have kid play areas... It seems that everyone is happier.
• I just had my first coffee of the day (3:45pm) and I'm feeling much better.

===========

I know these are first world questions and observations and that there are different places to focus my energy. But sometimes you just have to get them out of your system before you can go on. The trick is not wallowing in your own "stuff", instead moving on to the life God is calling you to live.

I was listening to a song by King and Country. It's words sum up how I understand God is calling us to live.

So let my life be the proof,
The proof of Your love.

God has been good to me today, with lots more in store, I'm sure. 

Peace, Deb

My favorite moment of the day:  When I came out of the bathroom a few minutes ago, I saw a couple sporting bright orange T-shirts proclaiming "Clemson Mom" and "Clemson Dad". When I went to speak to them, the mom showed me a picture of the daughter, they just settled in to begin her PhD program there. She asked me to take their picture, then she asked to take mine. The American dream is still alive for that family.

Days of Infamy

I got up in the middle of the night on Thursday to write this post.  It had been rolling around in my head for a couple of days and I just couldn't sleep until I put my hands to keys.

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"December 7, 1941... a day that will live in infamy."  These words were spoken by Franklin Roosevelt before a joint session of Congress to formally announce the attack on Pearl Harbor, and signaled our full participation in World War II.  But more that entering the war, that day changed something about the American experience. After that day, we thought differently about ourselves and one another.

I have thought of those words and their sentiment a lot in the last four weeks.  I looked back over my life and remembered other days of infamy.  Some of them have become memorable only in retrospect, like my baptismal day - August 29, 1959.  Others are shared events which seem to change everything.  September 11, 2001 is one of those days. I looked at the world differently after that morning.  And I saw myself in a new way, too.  For the first time, I understood that my calling was not just about serving churches and bringing home a pay check.  Instead, it was about being a representative for Christ in a world that could barely process what it had experienced and seen.  It was about meeting people where they were... proclaiming a word of hope... and using my gifts and training in ways I had never expected.

Since then, there have been seven more Air Force moves... seven moving vans... seven trips back and forth across the country and the ocean... seven sets of goodbyes and hellos... seven churches and chapels and communities of faith in which to put my trust and service.

And just when I thought I had it mostly figured out, here came another day.  May 3, 2013... that is the date when the world changed again for me.  I have been a pastor for twenty-two years, and a military spouse for over eighteen.  But on this day, the unthinkable happened.  A KC-135 air refueling aircraft crashed overseas, killing all three airmen aboard.  In your mind, you know that this can happen.  As a command spouse, you go to training so that you know what to expect.  But when the call comes, it's almost paralyzing.  All those lessons are momentarily forgotten as you ask the question, "What now?"

Just two days earlier, I had wrapped up a study on the book of Romans at the base chapel.  In our last night's discussion, we talked at length about the passages in Romans 8.  So I knew in my head and in my heart that even though the darkness seemed to be crowding in, that we were not abandoned by God.  "Nothing can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus, our Lord" (Romans 8:39). That became my mantra, and I shared that message with everyone who could hear it.

And just this week, I heard these verses with fresh ears, "Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?'  And I said, 'Here am I. Send me!'" (Isaiah 6:8).

Military members die.  They know that is a possibility when they commit to this life of service.  As their spouses, we also know it is a possibility.  But I did not fully appreciate the sacrifice that these members and their families make until I stood on the flight line beside my husband and watched our airmen come home for a final time.  I felt the burden of war and service most acutely in that moment.  And I cried silent tears for the loss of amazing young leaders, two sons and a daughter, a husband and a wife, a father and a mother, and for all the hopes and dreams that can no longer be fulfilled in the ways originally imagined.

And now I understand something my Methodist minister grandfather used to say: "It's times like these that will either drive you to the bottle or to your knees."  Thank goodness I have found out that my arthritic knees are a whole lot stronger than I had imagined them to be.

The funerals and memorial services are complete.  The extended families will be returning home soon.  And we will still be here, caring for our surviving families and for one another.  And all I ask is that God will give us the strength and courage to run the race before us as a marathon and not a sprint.  We have a long way to go.  Pray for us.

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.  And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.  And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.  (Romans 8:27-29)

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The original post ended here, and I wrestled back and forth on whether to even post or not.  My friend Meredith read it and said yes, but still I hesitated.  But then my friend Shelly posted an update from her first annual conference meeting.  This quote from the bishop there echoes the swirl of emotions that we all experience in the midst of struggles and disappointments. His challenge is exactly what I needed to hear... God works through the pain to show us a bigger world and a better plan that we can make for ourselves. 

There’s no way around it. Real life’s really tough. You do things you regret, suffer for no apparent reason and have to deal with bad people who do horrible things. No wonder you yearn for God to give you what you can never get on your own – peace, security and sanctuary from all those things that threaten to overwhelm you. But don’t look for God to wave a heavenly magic wand that makes all of your troubles go away. In fact, sometimes God actually wants your life to be more difficult because God needs you to do some things that are risky, scary and, frankly, may seem impossible. Like not hiding from others’ suffering, but reaching out to share God’s transforming love. Not running away from problems, but getting involved to make a difference. And not turning your back on people who make you uncomfortable, but reaching out to them as sisters and brothers. But something amazing happens every single time you do God’s difficult things – you discover more purpose, meaning and, even, joy than you can possibly imagine. So step out boldly in faith today. Don’t ask God to make your life easy. Instead, ask God to show you how you can share God’s love – even if it is exceedingly difficult. - Bishop Gary Mueller, Great New Jersey Annual Conference United Methodist Church. 

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you?

To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.   Micah 6:8

Peace, Deb

Reflections on being a "Martha"

Today I posted this on my Facebook page yesterday ...

Something I've learned about myself in the last few weeks... In a crisis I might offer to cook for you before I offer to pray for you... That is definitely the "Martha" coming out in me.

By midnight 35 people had "liked" my post... I think I'm not the only one who feels this way...

I had this realization when my friend and neighbor fell ill at home and was taken to the hospital for treatment. Everyone stepped up to care to things as needed.  Someone took the preschooler home, another met the middle school bus.  And all I could think to do was cook.  Before I even realized the words had come out of my mouth, I found myself saying, "If they need dinner tonight, I can get that together without any problem."  And so I came home, opened the pantry and the freezer, and started putting together a meal that would be appreciated by two teenage boys and a preschooler.

And while I was cooking, I thought about all of the time that I have spent in the kitchen in the last two
weeks... and in my life.  I thought about the joy that preparing food for others gives me... about how I keep my kitchen stocked for emergency meals.  I thought about how being busy made me feel useful.  And I asked God to be present in the moment, with my friend and her family, and with me as I tried to meet a need.

My husband asks, "Why do we need six pounds of butter in the freezer?"  Two weeks ago on Friday, I knew the answer to that question.  When three aircrew members from our base were killed in an overseas plane crash, the only thing I knew to do was to start baking.  Within a couple of hours I had baked four dozen banana muffins and delivered them to the staff at my husband's office.  Within the week, I had also made two crock pots of chili, one pot of chicken and sausage stew, three recipes of the best salsa ever, a pan of brownies and baked 15 dozen cookies. Within a few days, many of us had gathered to remember and support one another.  There was enough food to feed the whole base.  It is as if our collective motto had become, "When in doubt, cook."

In Luke 10, we see Mary and Martha preparing for a visit from Jesus.  When he begins teaching, Mary sits down to listen, but the passage says that Martha becomes distracted by the preparations that had to be made, wanting her sister to come and help out.  Jesus' response holds up Mary's choice to be the student and Martha is left to finish the work alone.  But I think what people don't understand is that offering hospitality is Martha's way of honoring Jesus.  She, too, wanted to give him her best.  I certainly can relate.

It's not that I'm not praying while I'm baking.  On the contrary, each meal prepared is filled with prayers for healing, hope, comfort, and the presence of God's grace and peace.  Some people are most spiritually centered when they are quiet, alone, in meditation.  But others feel closer to God when they are busy, trying
to meet the needs of others with the things their actions provide.

So I wonder, what do you do when confronted with a crisis or unusual situation?

Baking muffins and cookies or making a pasta casserole may not change the world... or maybe they can.  With God, nothing is impossible.

Peace, Deb

What I learned from "Lent in Pictures 2013"

I took the challenge - for my Lenten discipline I documented a photo a day, using this list as my inspiration.  Initially, I was concerned because here in our little corner of Washington State, I didn't know how I would find a picture to go with each of these themes.  But it only took a couple of days to realize that I didn't need to take any new pictures.  I had at my disposal the photographic record of many of the most places and happenings of my life, at least in the last twenty years.

And so I decided to use these pictures as a way of remembering how God has been with me in my life, in happy times and sorrowful, in obvious ways and in hidden ways that I could only see when I combed through my memory and hopefully found a picture to match.

What an amazing journey!  Through our pictures, I realized that I am very, very blessed.  My life doesn't really look like what I imagined, as I have said before... becoming a pastor, marrying into the military, moving so much that my minister friends can't keep up with me, living outside the US... yeah, non of that was in my plan.

And yet, at every turn, I can see the hand of God.  In nature, in friendships, in ministry opportunities that I never asked for - sometimes I didn't really want.  But God used me - then and now - and I am at peace.

This Lenten season I learned that looking into the past, we can see the promises of God unfolding before us.  Blessings that didn't look much like much at the time are now our most treasured experiences, opening the door to new fields of mission and ministry, and flooded with the presence of the Holy Spirit, just as Jesus promised.  I think that I will call this Lenten journey, "Perspective," for I have been reminded once again, "God is good... all the time."

Many blessings for a joyous fifty days of Easter!

Peace, Deb

John 14:27  [Jesus said,] "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not let them be afraid. (New Revised Standard Version - 1989)