Moving Musings 2014 - The Problem with Change...

It seems that an inordinate number of my friends are in moving mode this year, and it's a little unsettling, to say the least. No one is where I expect them to be. Some are in transit, like we are. Others are in transition, finding and moving into homes, looking for dentists and hairdressers, seeking a new favorite marker, making new friends. And some have been left behind, adjusting their old lives to new realities, welcoming new friends (I hope) and seeking a new normal.

Many people along our journey have said, "I don't know how you do it," when they hear this is our 11th move as a family in almost 20 years. But just because you stay in one town or house for a long time doesn't mean you don't have to deal with change.

I've found a lot of good quotes about change - here are some of my favorites:
"The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old but on building the new." Socrates
"The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance." Allan W. Watts
“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”  Mahatma Gandhi
"Progress is impossible without changes, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything." George Bernard Shaw
"All great changes are preceded by chaos." Deepak Chopra

But in the midst of the change - upheaval - uncertainty - crisis, it is easy to forget this kind of wisdom. Our comfort levels are upset, the security blanket of friends and/or family is slightly tattered, and we are unsure which way to turn.

I was just thinking this week about all of the challenges I encountered in the last two years. They were not necessarily bad things, but in hindsight, they helped me to grow in amazing ways. And now I miss them! And the good stuff looks almost even better than it did when I was in the middle of it. The difficulties of the past have faded away, and even before I arrive at my new home, I cannot imagine that it could be any better than what I experienced before.

Which is silly, and a little short-sighted, even though it doesn't feel that way to the time.

Here's what I keep reminding myself, and maybe it will be of help to you, no matter what kind of change you are going through.

God has a plan. And this is what that plan looks like.

1 - There are new friends waiting in your new situation. Going to a new place? There are people who want to be your friend. Staying behind? There are people who are coming in who are looking for someone to show them the ropes. Do you have expectations about the way things are "supposed to be"? Put those expectations aside and be open to new friendships in new places. When my spouse was stationed at the Pentagon, it was really hard to make friends. So I ended up teaching a few friends to crochet and we met once a month to share ideas, patterns and conversation. Those women have at the same time become my closest prayer warriors, even though we have lived in four different time zones.

2 - There is work to be done. And I'm not just talking about the unpacking kind of work. Some of my best experiences have come when I got outside my house (and my head) and went to find something to do. In military communities, it often comes in volunteering at the Thrift Shop or working on a committee. In churches, it could be teaching or helping with a mission project or supporting an activity that a church group is sponsoring. At our Spokane church, I volunteered as an overnight host when the Family Promise shelter used our facilities four times a year. Not only did I have an opportunity to help families in need, but made several new church friends in the process. And it might the thing I miss the most right now.

3 - God is in it all. In the midst of change, it often feels that God is missing in action. But that could not be further from the truth. God is always there, even when it feels like things are falling apart. I remember the TV series, Joan of Arcadia, about a
teen girl who hears God speak to her on a regular basis. But it's not a booming or ethereal voice... it's the voice of a boy in her class, and the guy who drives a garbage truck, and a telephone lineman. Joan experiences God in many of the people she meets, and even though many people think she's a little crazy, it totally changes the way she lives her life. And gives her live a meaning that she never knew before.

Different doesn't always mean worse, but it does mean that we will be asked to recognize that everyone has different gifts and graces, and that we might be called to grow in ways we never expected. Getting out of our comfort zones seems to be a part of this bargain - we are not bound to our pasts and can go into the future knowing that with faith and trust, all things can be new again.

For me as a person of faith, the best news is this - whatever the change that is happening in my life - I can count on this great truth:

"Jesus Christ is the same, yesterday and today and forever!" Hebrews 13:8

When I was preparing for ordination in 1993, I was asked this question at my interview in preparation for final approval: "Where do you see yourself in ministry in ten years?" I thought for a minute and then spoke from the heart a truth I knew could well keep me on the bench for another year, because it was not the standard answer. I said, "I have spent a lot of time in my life tell God what I wanted to do and where I wanted to go, and he just laughs. 'Go ahead,' God says, 'make your plans, but be ready to make a detour when I find something I need you to do.' So in ten years, I just want to be faithful, listening and going wherever I'm called."

Little did we know....

Peace, Deb